Entry tags:
Truth Meme
Truth Meme

Somehow, there is kirin on you.
Most likely, it is the fur of the kirin that was caught in the environment of wherever you’ve been; there is a stray hair on you because one was on the seat you sat on upon the train or because it blew onto the brim of your hat in the wind.
Or it may be because you met the kirin—a playful ungulate moose-sized spirit who prefers not to speak—and engaged with him and gave him a pat, or a scratch behind an ear. Maybe the kirin nosed or licked your hand because you made him laugh (it’s an adorable ‘keh keh keh’ sound).
Unfortunately for both you and the kirin (who had not meant to trouble your day like this, truly), this exposure to his dander has only one reaction, and it happens to 100% of Star Children: you are compelled to tell the entire truth. About what is less specific; you are compelled simply to announce things about yourself—your life, experiences, thoughts, opinions, feelings. No matter if it’s something silly and inconsequential, deep or secretive, life-altering or commonplace. Some may choose to do this by employing Foxi and their relic; others by finding people to exchange truth with to face to face.
When you have met the kirin’s subconscious desire for four hours, you will be free from the truth telling and the recipient of 24 hours of good luck. The good luck will be sometime in the next year rather than in the next day, and you may have no idea where it came from, but you’ll know a lucky day when you have it!
- This meme is game canon unless marked otherwise at the start of threads! Threads can be used for spoons and application samples.
- Assume all characters involved on this meme are affected.
- Characters will compulsively state truths about themselves/their feelings on the network or in-person. Top-levels may include either/both options.
- Please include prompts in your top level.
- All questions will be answered with complete and total honesty. No special abilities, half-truths, or omissions can avoid sharing all of the truth.
- Meme is open until the next truth meme!
- After one month, you may use the kirin mechanic generally in game. It can be one-sided! All truth-telling characters must consent.
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"I hate bologna," Ava responds automatically, without having to put much thought into it at all. The rest of the meats don't make too much difference to her. Not enough to have ranked them in any order of preference.
"Bill is... my adopted father, that found me in the orphanage when my parents died in the accident. He took me back to SHIELD, where he was a scientist in the Quantum research division. He thought they'd help me." Which ties in well to his follow up question, her expression darkening slightly. "My abilities are actually a rather unpleasant condition, that's actively destroying my body's ability to remain intact. I was dying, up until the moment I arrived here. Supposedly... it won't get any worse." But her tone implies she doesn't fully trust that arrangement either, given what happened with SHIELD's false promises.
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Dex noted the preference on bologna and went about putting everything else on the bread. He finished making two very large and full sandwiches that would have done any deli in NYC proud. Then he put a pickle off to the side on each of the plates and took one over to slide it in front of Ava before going over to the fridge. "What do you like to drink?"
He listened as Ava told him a little bit about her background while they ate. What he heard pinged some of that limited empathy that he was capable of, given how unfortunately similar their circumstances were. It was one of the only ways she would have been able to. "You too, huh?" Was he referring to having an adoptive parent, being an orphan that had happened because of an accident, or both? He didn't bother to say anything else that would make his question less vague. "What happens if it does get worse?"
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She pokes a bit at the sandwich, hungry despite the subject matter. "This looks much better than anything I throw together myself," she admits. Even having watched him make it, she's not sure she could fully replicate such a sandwich without her desire to just call it good enough halfway through. The little pickle off to the side such a small detail, one she'd dismiss as not worth the effort, yet feels extra special. "Tea, if you have any," she responds automatically. "Water if you don't. I'm actually perfectly fine without tea, if it's too much to prepare. I'm sorry, I'm not trying to be fussy. I would have just said water, if I could." God, she feels so annoying about having to explain her entire thought process behind something that should be relatively simple, accidentally making it more complicated than she intended.
She chews on the sandwich for awhile just to shut herself up. Chews to put off having to answer. But eventually she has to. "My body will rapidly deteriorate, my molecules would fail to realign with reality, and I would be torn apart bit by bit until nothing else of me existed."
cw: suicidal ideation
...Of course, he was thinking this as he fixed Ava food and opened up with her about some of his trauma, so clearly that wasn't going well. "Exactly. He's a psychopath of a different kind. I've always wanted to do what he did and hurt or kill whoever I wanted but I didn't. I tried to be a good person even though it was a struggle every day. Then I saw him doing it and getting rewarded for screwing over every single person that crossed his path just so he could achieve his own goals."
He realized he'd forgotten something and got up to get a bag of chips before setting it down in front of Ava. "I like creating food," he explained. "It still requires accuracy just like shooting a gun. Just of a different kind." Fortunately, he didn't see anything wrong with Ava clarifying a couple different ways what she had initially meant. When Ava said she'd like some tea, he stayed up and looked in his cabinets before he found a tin with a couple different basic kinds in it. He set it in front of her. "I'm more of a coffee drinker but here you go. Knock yourself out."
"That sounds--" He almost said 'hard' but he couldn't, not when that was just a platitude and lie he'd spouted off so often. Instead, he took a bite of his sandwich so he could tell the truth without having it come out as sounding completely cruel or callous. "--like a truly shitty way to die. I'd just kill myself or go out fighting someone else before I'd let anything like that happen to me."
cw: suicidal ideation
"People with power will always get away with much worse, and we will always be vilified for trying to push back. The same government that made me a killer, now considers me a fugitive and a criminal to hunt down because I got away. Utilizing the same tactics they taught me to use against their enemies, but for my own survival." She huffs out, clearly shares in that bitterness. She takes it out on the chip bag, tearing it right open with a small 'thank you.'
"Never really learned to cook. A lot of tasks that require concentrated hand-eye coordination for long periods of time get a bit exhausting," Ava admits. "Though my hands are more reliable than they've been. Less things slipping through them. Just when I'm nervous or distracted." A wince, at that last part sneaking out too. But she manages to make tea without any incidents, though it's obvious the way she handles cups that she's trying to be extra careful. "I have specially designed gloves, but... then I can't really feel things. I like getting to feel things. The textures. Temperature," like the warm mug in her grasp. She feels like most people take that ability for granted.
"It was a horrifying way to die," Ava agrees. "I thought about it, taking the easy way. But I wasn't ready to. There's still so much I've never gotten to do. I wanted so badly to finally live."
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"I try to find things to keep my mind occupied. It's dangerous when I get bored." That wasn't hyperbole. Without a purpose, the voices and buzzing came back, along with all the dark ideas that made him think hurting other people or killing them was the only way to center himself again. "You'd get a kick out of shopping for clothes then with how all the different clothes feel."
"What haven't you gotten to do?" He asked curiously. She did seem rather sheltered all things considered from what he'd learned about her so far.
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She nods along, can understand getting restless without much to do, even to the point of it turning dangerously so. "I was left alone for long periods of time. Got used to being bored," she bites into her sandwich, chips adding an extra crunch. She looks delighted by it. "I don't care much about clothing, other than the practical purpose of keeping covered. I don't think I'd look good in anything fashionable." She stares intently at her sandwich, really hopes the truth doesn't prompt him to confirm that she's indeed a bit hideous.
"Much of anything, really. Never been to a theme park. Or a beach. Or gone camping. Never been on a vacation. Only sightseeing I did was from transport vehicles during missions. Never attended school, though sometimes I sat in on Bill's lectures. Never been to a dance, or a date, or ki-" Ava shoves so much of the sandwich into her mouth all at once to prevent that from turning into more of a confession.
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"I doubt that. I think you'd look really pretty in a dress." Then he just sort of sunk down further into his chair as embarrassment took over and he realized once again he'd just blurted out exactly what he was thinking. That was it, he was officially gonna hunt down the kirin, shoot him, and mount his stuffed head over his doorway. Only then would Dex feel better about this whole clusterfuck of a situation.
At first, he wasn't sure what Ava was desperately trying to keep from saying by filling her mouth with food when she'd been right in the middle of a sentence. Then the first part of the word and the second missing clicked into his head. He wasn't about to laugh but a slow (and slightly evil) smile did come over his face. "I didn't quite catch that last word. What was it?" That faux innocent tone wasn't going to fool anyone. Dex clearly knew what he was doing.
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But it's the deliberate baiting that she takes the most exception to, an annoyed muffle around a large mouthful of sandwich. Normally she wouldn't talk with her mouth full, but this damned spell is making it impossible not to respond. "KISS." She tosses the rest of her sandwich down on the plate, face burning with shame. Can only interpret that smug look on his face as cruel mockery at her expense. "OKAY? I NEVER KISSED ANYONE. IS THAT WHAT YOU WANT TO HEAR? YOU WANT TO LAUGH ABOUT THAT? THAT THE WEIRD SHELTERED FREAK IS SO REVOLTING?"
The teacup hits the ground, shattering with a splash of tea across his too clean kitchen. And then she's vanished.
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".....Ava?" He called out cautiously as if she might suddenly reappear just as abruptly as she had disappeared. He honestly sounded a little bewildered, trying to figure out how that had all gone so very wrong in the span of about two minutes. Dex was also really hoping she didn't have the sort of homicidal instincts he possessed, where she'd try to stick a knife into him for the apparent grave insult he'd said.
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"Where's your towels...?" her voice weakly asks from behind, as she goes through a few drawers. The least she can do is clean up first.
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He let the awkward silence hang in the air for about a minute before he went on, his tone now more quiet and subdued. At least she'd know he was telling the complete truth. "...I wasn't going to laugh. I actually thought that was kind of cute, just like you are." That last bit he hadn't meant to slip out but it appeared this compulsion meant everything had to be said no matter how much he didn't want it to. "I was a weird sheltered freak too. I didn't go to a regular school after the age of eight and spent the majority of my time in a psychiatric institute. Which is just a nicer way of saying an insane asylum. I spent most of my time going to therapy and figuring out how to imitate being a normal person. I didn't actually get the chance to kiss anyone until well after I'd turned eighteen."
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"I-" she glances over, expression uncertain. "Don't know how to take that comment." A tilt of her head. "Being cute seems like a term used for... animals or small children." Of which she is neither. "And to be compared to such makes me feel like it's meant to be demeaning. But you don't seem to be using it in that way. So I'm not sure how to take it." She blots up more tea, and then starts carefully picking at some of the larger chunks of shattered cup.
"I think you do a more convincing job of imitating normalcy than I do," she comments, a strange sort of compliment but obviously genuine. "I didn't go to school either. Just had tutoring from various SHIELD scientists. Wasn't raised around anyone else my age, just authority figures. Makes it difficult for me to interact with... peers." And thus can't quite figure out the difference between friendly teasing and outright judgment and criticism.
"How did you end up in an insane asylum? I guess I understand not wanting to kiss anyone there. No offense. All I really know about them is that one movie. One flew over the cuckoo's nest."
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"I was taught how to fake it well by my therapist," he went on to explain. "She basically had to do the equivalent of emergency triage on my mind once she figured out what was going on with me and quickly teach me the most important things I needed to learn before my thinking got too rigid." The mention of not being around peers his own age sounded similar to him as well. "You don't usually end up in places like that until your early teens no matter how severe your issues are, so I didn't have a whole lot of interaction with people my own age for a long time."
He groaned and put a hand over his eyes. "Don't even mention that movie to me. I hate it. It makes everyone still think psychiatric institutes are still stuck in the 60s with lobotomies and electroshock treatments." He paused for a moment, trying to resist what he wanted to say in regards to her question. This would usually be the moment where her either refused to answer or only gave out a half-truth but neither would suffice right now. So he had to give the unfiltered honest truth. "I killed someone." He glanced over to see what expression might have been on Ava's face after he said that.
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"Are you faking around me? Who you are. I would prefer you not. I have a difficult enough time trying to discern anyone's real intentions. And as hard as it is to get to know people, it would be disappointing to know that all my efforts went into trying to get to know somebody that doesn't actually exist." A frown. "Unless you prefer not to know me at all." She holds up the stained towel, not sure where to dispose of it.
"Have you ever been electroshocked? I have. They wanted to test out the limits of my abilities." Ava grits her teeth slightly, not exactly happy that she mentioned that, doesn't want to give away her weaknesses. But it's hardly as much of a confession as Dex's. But as desensitized to killing as she is... "Did they deserve it?"
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Dex chuckled briefly for a moment when Ava asked if he'd been trying to mask as normal person around her. "Considering the first time we met you told me you wanted to gouge my eyes out, I definitely didn't feel the need to put forth the effort and try to pretend to be normal around you." He paused for a moment. "You can just put that in the sink," he told her when she held up the stained towel she was holding.
"No. The kind of thing that's wrong with me can't be fixed by putting an electric current through my brain." He ran a hand down his face when Ava asked if whoever he'd killed had deserved it, even when he'd been so young. "...Yeah, he did." At least in Dex's warped mind he had, given the sense of betrayal and anger he'd felt as a child when his coach had done nothing more than told him the hard, honest truth.
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She drops the stained towels into the sink, after double checking that she did a decent enough job of cleaning up. "Maybe that's why it felt so weird, when you were looking at me so intently when we met," though she does sound more relieved than anything, for whatever reason. "But you seemed far more annoyed by me, than... thinking I was cute." Which still feels like a strange word to use, in regard to herself, even with his explanation.
"But I did also observe in addition to your eyes, that you have very desirable facial proportions, and can appreciate that you are-" her eyes progressively widen with horror at what she's saying and unable to stop it. "Strongly built. Good shoulders-" Ava turns away quickly so she can't see Dex right in front of her to keep prompting her overly honest mouth to keep listing off every attractive quality he has. "But you seem the type that already knows it." Because of course he does.
"Not that it helps with your... everything else. Which is. Kind of my point. Looks didn't prevent us from getting hurt, or fix us. Just..." a peek back over at him. Breathes out, because now she can't stop noticing and it's distracting, barely registering that she's paused mid-thought.
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Once again, Dex found a fiendish sense of delight in the fact that Ava apparently couldn't stop telling the truth either and it showed right on his face. Since they were equally stuck in this mess together, at least they could both end up getting embarrassed by what was going on. And it was a bit surprising to learn the fact that she was apparently.....attracted to him? He certainly hadn't been expecting that! But he'd learned his lesson when teasing her about never being kissed and refrained from saying anything else.
Instead, he focused on addressing the last bit of what she'd said. "You're right. They don't prevent anything like that from happening. But there's a certain sense of confidence you get if someone says you look good. At least for most people. Because not everyone has that happen to them, so when you're noticed by someone like that, it makes you feel good. And I hope that's something you can understand someday because I think you deserve to feel wanted and attractive." Then, feeling like he'd said too much, he became immensely interested in the grain of the wood in his kitchen table.
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She listens, truly trying to take in what he's saying even if it goes so much against what she knows and how she sees herself or what good any of it does anyway. "Confidence," Ava repeats, uncertain. "Mine is derived from knowing I have the upper hand in a conflict. Or when I know I can figure out the solution to a complex puzzle or equation." Her hands twist in front of her, absently wishing she had the towel in her grip to take her uncertainty out on.
"But." A glance down at herself, her same old outfit she's always wearing, trying to see through somebody else's eyes what makes any of it appealing. Yet knows he's obviously telling some version of the truth, even if it's one she can't manage to make sense of. "I don't think I can easily get past how monstrous I feel. When I look in the mirror, all I see is something broken. It's... nice, someone sees more than that."
no subject
He was able to respect how Ava was able to find confidence in her accomplishments even if she couldn't see them in her looks just yet. Maybe he could help her with that down the line. Assuming they didn't get into another angry fight and tried to kill one another.
Both of them were busy not looking at one another but Dex was fine with that, especially when they were getting into such personal and heavy topics with one another. "I understand that completely. That's all I see when I look in the mirror too. A monster pretending to be human, someone who's broken and can't be fixed no matter what I do."
Then he finally looked back up at her. "But my mom taught me that I'm not broken, even if I don't believe it. That my mind just works differently than everyone else's and that's not always a bad thing. Just because you've done bad things doesn't mean you're a bad person. Not entirely." If only he was able to believe that himself.
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"I don't think it's a bad thing, to think differently. My father got criticized for that a lot, apparently. For his ideas, his experiments. Got told he was insane, got called an Egghead and driven out of the scientific community." Ava pauses, fists clenching slightly. "But I always thought he was brilliant. You know, up until he got our entire family blown up." And no, she did not want to add that last part. "But everyone subscribing to the same patterns of thought and allowing others at their churches or on the news or some podcast to tell them what to believe. Those are the people that are broken. Can't even tell you why they think the way they do."
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"Blown up?" He questioned before he could stop himself. The wording just sounded very odd to Dex and he couldn't help but he curious about the accident that had killed Ava's parents and left her an orphan.
"They're sheep," Dex said dismissively. "Content to move in a giant herd all heading the same direction, even if it leads them all over a cliff together." Meanwhile, Dex felt like he was the one wolf among them, able to see clearly what was going to happen to all the little herbivores around him.
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"Yes, in a lab accident. My father's experiment, he was building a quantum tunnel that went unstable. That's why I am the way I am." Well, the invisible bit more directly, and most of her issues stemming from all of the abuse and exploitation following. Really, it's defined most of her life with one traumatic event.
She gives a hum of agreement. "There's no way for me to ever exist among them. Sometimes I think I'm meant to be alone, forever."
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"You and me both," Dex agreed. "I just resigned myself to being alone forever back home. Never letting anyone know the real me because it didn't matter." He paused for a moment and looked over at Ava again. "But I feel less alone here than I ever have before."
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She crosses her arms tightly over her midsection, nods along. "Guess we never would have met, back there. Opposite sides of the country. Funny how it's easier to feel alone the more people there are..." she glances away. "I like when it's just. Us."
"I should go."
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