folkmeme | leap night tfln

It's not a matter of trust. I trust you.

Killua also asked me not to... do. things. It's easier when no one knows.

Listen, I don't need to know if it's easier when no one knows. Especially if it's something you can't control.

I want to hug you.

Want me to stop by?

*nod nod* I'm at home. [ She means the Miss Madeleine. ]

I'll be there in a little bit.

Nereid is a bit of a trek from Lapine even with access to the train. It's almost enough to make her consider putting Lore towards a form of personal transportation. She never saw the need in Trench, not when she could use the lanterns to get from major district to major district. Maybe she needs to put her Lore towards a few lanterns (the lamp buddies would be fun to explain to the other Star Children).

By the time she reaches the Miss Madeleine, she's a bit out of breath, cheeks a touch flushed, but a little physical exertion is a worthwhile price for a hug. She announces her presence as she steps onto the boat with a huffed, "Knock knock!" Sharon Da Silva still does not know boat etiquette!

Nanika waits inside the boat. She's still nervous sometimes about going outside. What if their neighbors don't like her? Most of the boats don't belong to anyone, but that could change any day. She holds onto her plushie from Sharon to feel warm and loved and safe. It's amazing. Maybe the best magical item in all of Folkmore, adoption plushies.

The knock comes, and Nanika braces herself in case it's someone else. Someone not Sharon. It's still likely someone friendly in that case. Like Geto or Gojo. Rainbow dragon is nice. She goes to the door, opens it, and visibly relaxes when it's Sharon. Nanika immediately wraps her arms around Sharon, plushie in hand. "I love you, Sharon."

Sharon pulls Nanika in close and gently brushes her fingers through the teen's hair, pleasantly surprised at the rush of adoration. She bends and presses a kiss to the top of the girl's skull before she gently pulls back enough to look her in the face. Her smile warms. "I love you, too, Nanika, and nothing in the world can change that."

She knows what it's like to need to keep secrets from the people you love and the emotions, the fear and worry and shame, that come with it. Neither Alluka or Nanika need that weight on their shoulders. They've gone through enough.

"You all right?"

Nanika blinks away a couple tears where her face presses into Sharon because it is so nice to hear those words. They're rare, although less rare in Folkmore than in her life so far back home. She's a secret back home, mostly. So secret most people don't get the chance. Still, Nanika understands it's important, and she's okay with that. For Killua's sake. She'd do anything for Killua.

"This is better than the relic," Nanika says. As much as she appreciates staying in touch with people, with photos and things sent to her, nothing is like seeing people, being able to hug them, and spending time with them.

"I don't like having secrets from you."

Her expression softens at the sight of Nanika's damp lashes and she pulls her in for a second, quicker hug, her hold just a little tighter. When she pulls back again, her smile is sympathetic. Secrets are tough but tougher when you're young and uniquely awful when you have to hide them from someone trusted.

"I know... but it's okay." No matter how curious she might be, she'd never press either Nanika or Alluka about it and not just because it's obvious how important it is for them to keep. "It doesn't change how I see you. Either of you. It doesn't change how much I care."

Nanika could have hugged Sharon forever. Just hug her and hug her and hug her and not talk about anything. Especially something like this. Something she hasn't had to talk about because no one knows. Almost no one knows back home, but Nanika's almost only interacted with those people.

She looks down, her attention on Sharon's shoes. They're dirty, and Nanika would be happy to clean them sometime. "It changes how anyone sees me." She pauses, reconsiders Gon. "Almost anyone."

Her hands wring together, and Nanika hurriedly adds. "I believe you!"

"But it's all right if you don't," Sharon adds quickly, dropping to her knees so they're closer to the same height, and gently takes both of the young teen's hands in her own. "Or if you're uncertain."

When you've been burned too many times, you question even the safest contained flames. "Is there anything I can do to set your mind at ease, Nanika?"

Nanika stares with wide pits of eyes at Sharon, amazed at the words. Shocked by them. The idea it would be okay to doubt Sharon, her feelings, and her knowledge of herself. The idea Nanika could do that without driving a wedge between them. The idea this secret that has lived so long already now existing here they both know it is so won't hurt how much Sharon trusts her, likes her, or wants to spend time with her. It's all an awful lot.

"I don't know," Nanika admits. "No one's ever tried." Either her mind is easy around people or it isn't. Killua was mean one time, and he apologized. Sharon hasn't been mean. She has nothing to apologize for.

No one's ever tried. Four little words that manage to both catch Sharon off-guard, even as aware as she is of Nanika's strange position in the Zoldyck family, and resound deeply within her. She swallows back any potential tears. You don't have to fuck up to try. Rose didn't make any mistakes, she was just the woman who was willing to try.

"Then it's something we can figure out together," Sharon says. There will be mistakes, of course. Of course. "If that's something you would want."

Nanika wraps her arms around Sharon again and presses her face into Sharon's chest. It's so much that Sharon wants to help her, wants to try, and that alone makes Nanika feel better. The hug is also nice. They remind her of Alluka and how much Alluka likes hugging people. Nanika picked them up from her.

"So I'm good?" Nanika asks. Good as in a good girl. Good as in Sharon loves and approves of her. Good as in she makes Sharon happy. Nanika tries very hard to be good. It's the best feeling in the world when someone tells her she's been good. Like she's loved and everything's right in the world.

"You're good, Nanika, you'll always be good." She runs her fingers through the teen's ink-dark hair in short strokes. There's nothing Nanika could do to change that. "You don't ever have to worry about that with me."

She wants Nanika to feel the same sense of love and acceptance from her as Sharon felt from her adoptive parents. Unconditional, never-ending, and steadfast.

Tears stream out of Nanika's eyes, and they blot into Sharon's shirt. Shirts. Sharon wears layers. Always be good. It makes Nanika so happy she cannot stop crying. She loves Sharon so much, and she's so glad to have her. She'd do anything, she knows, to help Sharon. Nanika doesn't say that though. Because Killua asked her not to use her powers. So she hasn't told Sharon. So Sharon doesn't know. Sharon has no idea.

Sharon, she dares to think, wouldn't care. That's not what Sharon wants from her, and that only makes Nanika happier. And cry more. Little happy hiccupy sobs.

The sound of her little sobs breaks Sharon's heart. She keeps her hold on Nanika tight, petting her back in smooth, soothing circles, the motion repetitive. Rose held her like this on more than one night, sometimes after a rough nightmare, other times when she'd been emotionally overwhelmed.

"I got you, Nanika," she mumbles into the girl's crown.

Nanika's hiccups quiet with a little time. The tears slow, and she wipes her face against another drier portion of Sharon's shirt. Then she looks up at Sharon, eyes wide and round and empty black.

"I love you, Sharon," she says. She knows she's said it before, but Nanika isn't sure how else to say it. It's true. "I trust you."

She considers. "Do you want to see my room?"

Sharon doesn't mind a single bit as Nanika wipes her tears. Her shirt will dry and, as it were, it feels like a Big Sister Moment. "I love you, too, Nanika," she responds instinctively and, at the declaration of trust, she leans forward to press a quick kiss to the girl's forehead before she finally stands. Nanika's trust is something she will cherish and protect. Her little sister.

"Hell yeah, I do!" Enthusiastic. Nanika is a teen, she can handle a little curse word or two. That's what big sisters do, too, right? A little loving corruption. She takes Nanika's hand. "You'll have to show me all your favorite things."

Nanika gladly takes Sharon's hand. It's nice stay connected like that. It's especially nice after hearing Sharon say she loves her. It never gets old to hear someone say that. Every time makes her feel warm and happy and safe. The sad is still there, but it has some better company. Like a warm blanket and hot drink when she has a cold.

Alluka leads into the boat. It's pretty large for a boat, but the rooms still are all contained within a boat. She quickly motions toward the rest as she takes Sharon toward the little hallway toward her room and Zechs's room. They're near each other, which is nice. Nanika doesn't get up in the night to ask for cuddles, but she likes that he's so close. That it'd be easy to do so if she wanted.

Her room has a bed. And it has plushies. Behind that, there's probably more. After all, there's some patterns on the wall. It's bright and happy. Nanika, in her time in Folkmore, has gained no shortage of plushies. Near the bed, within reach if wanted, the most important stuffed animals: the ones she's gained in adoptions (her panda is on the bed). "The games are in the living room," Nanika explains. Not everything she needs is here. She has more than a room.

Sharon grins to herself as Nanika leads her through the boat. It's larger than she'd expected. Comfortable. She can feel the rock of the water beneath her feet but it's not so distracting (even if she can't imagine trying to sleep here). A houseboat must seem like the dream home for a girl who grew up so isolated from the rest of the world; a home that can go anywhere.

Once in the bedroom, Sharon takes a seat on the edge of the bed as she takes it all in. She can see the girls reflected in the aesthetic but it's the many (many) stuffed animals that catch her attention. She reaches for the closest and grins down at its little face. "Quite the impressive collection." It already has her childhood collection beat. She returns the stuffed animal to its place. "Do you have a favorite?"

Beyond, of course, their adoption stuffies.

Nanika rocks from side to side, watching Sharon interact with her plushies. They're new since Folkmore, newer than the ones she had at home, but they're all special. They all mean something. Plus, the large panda plushie is from home. That one is Alluka's favorite, a fact that warms Nanika's heart.

"I love them all," Nanika says. She chews her lip. "Favorites are hard." Because she wants to point to the floppy teddy bear with big limbs as her favorite. Also the shark with an open mouth. Also the book plushie. Also the sunflower plushie. Also...

They keep going. All her favorites. It's part of the reason she has so many. She loves them. "People are better."

Favorites can be hard, though Sharon never had much trouble picking when she was younger. It was always the teddy bear, all his stuffing lumpy after years of cuddling; that's how you knew a stuffie was loved.

"I agree," she responds with a sharp nod, smile soft, "People are better." Not all people but the people she likes, the people she loves, will always be better.

The stuffed animals people give her mean the most. No matter what they look like or their size. They hold people's love within them, and that's most precious of all. There's nothing she wouldn't do for people she loves. Anything they ask for.

"I have people here," Nanika says. It's the best thing about Folkmore. She picks up one of her adoption plushies and squeezes it tight. She feels the love in it, warm and soothing. "You make me happy."

leap night tfln

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