leap night tfln

[folkie]

Texts From Last Night

Welcome to Folkmore's Texts From Last Night meme! This meme can be used as a branch off from our Test Drive Memes and be used as game canon or just for casual fun in the setting! You do not need to be in our game or be invited to play on our TFLN. This can be a great way to meet current players for future invites, get a feel for the setting, or just have some fun.

This can be used for samples on our applications and used as spoons for players accepted into the game!

TEXTS FROM LAST NIGHT GENERATOR

Comments

Astarion | Baldur's Gate 3

[honkdarling]

1. I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
2. I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
3. please don't ironically join a cult
4. You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
5. What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
6. There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
7. Wildcard. Text him.

3

[survivalthroughhate]

Alright, but what are your thoughts on STARTING a cult? With me as the leader of course.

[honkdarling]

Darling, I'll admit, the idea was tempting once. Control a cult, control the world. Now it seems more trouble than its worth.

Besides, why should YOU get to be the leader?

[survivalthroughhate]

Because I've done it before. I had a nice little cult I ran in the previous world I was in. The best part was THEY came to ME and wouldn't take no for an answer until I agreed to be their leader. Quite a satisfying experience to have people so loyal to you they are willing to live and die at your command.

3

[hiddenfates]

Do you want me to do it unironically? I've kind of been there, done that. Moonweaver be blessed!

[honkdarling]

Frankly, I'm not convinced that all gods aren't running cults. If you want to dance under the moon or whatever it is you do, go right ahead.

Just don't come crying to me if they want to brand you and turn you into a mind flayer.

[hiddenfates]

No, no, nothing like that. Just her practice is banned where I come from and has to be kept under wraps.

As for the brand thing - haven't been mindflayer'd, but I've got extensive tattoos already, does that count?

4

[drawsghosts]

I can shoot lightning from my fingers, I was fine.

[honkdarling]

So can Gale, but he couldn't fight his way out of a paper bag without assistance.

Did you have to use it?

[drawsghosts]

Thankfully no. I did telepathically break his chair with him in it when he turned out to be a lout.

6

[ironypoisoned]

You're right, that is suspicious. No one bird watches before the age of 45.

[honkdarling]

So what should I DO with it? It's looking at me now.

[ironypoisoned]

Make bird noises back.

[ Of course the literal actual dad of the Avengers is giving the advice of "play with the child". ]

4.

[therewerefifty]

I am hardly in any danger from a serial killer. But thank you for the concern.

[honkdarling]

Oh? And what makes you so special?

Unless you were hunting HIM? That would be an interesting twist!

[therewerefifty]

I'm not one for hunting them down, no. I merely know too many men who would fit that description. Most know better than to annoy me.

6

[branchingpaths]

Congratulations. You're a father now.

[honkdarling]

Har har. The world has certainly changed in the last 200 years, but it has not changed that much. Normal folk don't just pick up strange bird-calling children.

At least not me.

[branchingpaths]

I was about to say, I don't believe either of us qualify as 'normal.'

Does this child seem to be enjoying themself?

1.

[watersdeep]

I suppose it could be worse, one could taste like caustic bilge and then your whole evening would be ruined.

[honkdarling]

I do so appreciate your self-deprecating humor, Gale. I think I actually feel better.

Did Mystra have a taste? Or did she transcend such mortal things?

5

[stabgremlin]

Given that I've been led to believe that this is in fact the status quo, I'd say that as lives go, we're still doing okay.

Once they crash and burn with lethal does of radiation, dog shit, and oh, I don't know- venomous spiders and cat piss perhaps?- we can start worrying about doing worse than everyone else.

[honkdarling]

To be more explicit, there were a significant amount of giant venomous spiders as well.

And dog shit and cat piss, but that just comes with the territory of dogs and cats. Scratch was smart enough to take care of himself on the outskirts of camp.

That said, you do have a point -- our faces haven't exploded into tentacles, so that would put us in a better position than others, I suppose. It really is all about perspective, isn't it?

3

[melodiouspacifist]

Been there, done that, already got the t-shirt. Wouldn't recommend it.

[honkdarling]

Well good, at least we agree.

What kind of shirt is that?